Where Eagles Dare

I’m currently taking a longish break away from home, at the moment I’m on Bainbridge Island which is one of the islands in the Puget Sound close to Seattle, WA.  It’s stunningly gorgeous here, a little gem of an island far removed from the usual mainland USA even though it is very close geographically. It’s a little sanctuary and in fact, I was told it was only used by the native Indian women and men did not set foot upon the island as it was deemed to be the place where women would go for their menstruation periods, and other feminine transformational & transitional  experiences.

Apparently the only time men would come upon this island was for their first sexual initiation which was a sacred rite conducted by elder woman for the young men.  How true any of this is I’m not sure, though I must say the island is certainly having an effect on me; I feel very held here and have deepened my appreciation and gratitude for our Mother and all the She represents to us.

Although this is not Eugene, he looks just like this.

As I’m writing this at 2pm on a sunny afternoon, there is a young male deer in the garden at the home I’m staying in; he seems quite unperturbed by my presence and I am able to go outside and just sit observing him.  I’ve called him Eugene in honour of an animal totem vision I had many years ago in which I was approached by a young fawn, and on asking his name, he replied Eugene – which I did think was rather unusual!

This is my second visit to Bainbridge Island, I was first here back in 2004 when I was over from Scotland visiting my beloved Isaac in July of that year. We were doing a road trip, meeting some dear friends of his that he wanted me to meet.  One of those was Sula.  We visited with her for a couple of days and on our departure day we were sitting having breakfast at the Streamliner diner in Winslow, the main town on Bainbridge.

Isaac and Sula were chatting away after we ate and I allowed myself to drift off into a lovely soft state of consciousness (this was easy as I was almost constantly in a state of love-bliss the whole time I was with Isaac that trip).  My eyes settled on a photograph picture on the wall of an American bald eagle. The photo was a close up of the bird’s head and shoulders, in semi profile.

This picture here is similar in energy though the pose is different – the one in the diner showed more of it’s shoulders and that gave me a different perspective. I’ve always loved eagles and hawks and whilst I see a fair number of hawks, my sightings of eagles have been limited to once or twice in Scotland where I’ve golden eagles, and also on a skiing trip in Nevada.  I once saw a sea eagle which was so amazing.

Awesome Bald Eagle!

The photo drew me in and I was totally absorbed… I began to feel that the bird was actually right there in the diner… the sounds of the diner and of Isaac and Sula chatting faded into the background and I began to experience myself as the bird. I could feel the haughty magnificence of the eagle, it’s detached attitude, or more like, it’s non-attached nature. I could feel the way my head moved on my neck, like stretching your head up and shoulders down and swiveling the head around.  I felt the eagle’s strength and its ability to fly so powerfully and see from such a great distance… again, I felt the non-attached sovereign regal like haughtiness; not from it feeling superior to anything but simply it’s non-emotional nature, and it was at all not a cruel feeling.  I felt I could see from such a high perspective, so totally non-attached, I felt such power course through my body and felt my eyes shoot out intense lightning like energy that was so piercing in it’s crystal clear clarity.

At the same time, I was also observing my experience and was totally amazed at it all, it was so fascinating to be able to experience even a little of what it was to be an eagle; I was literally awestruck and as I came out of the experience I was not able to share it with Isaac and Sula.  I had to take some time to myself in the ladies room where I shed some tears at the sheer beauty of this bird and thanked the Source of Creation for my experience, and for gifting us the diversity of Earth’s nature.

Eye of a young male
Regal attitude

I had another eagle experience later on that road-trip whilst we were driving down from spending a few hours up Mt Shasta in California.  I was on the look for chipmunks (my God, how cute are they – I want one) which we don’t have in the UK and so didn’t notice a golden eagle soaring above.  It swooped down and flew right over our car; Isaac saw it and said it was no more than a few feet above us.  Though I didn’t actually see it, I could feel it’s HUGE presence and looked up and over at Isaac and said in awe “What on earth was that?”

To this day, when I tune in or see eagles, I can still feel some of that ‘eagle-ness’ in my body and whilst I have always loved and been called by eagles and hawks, I am now even more enchanted whenever I get the gift of seeing them.

My understanding of what happened was that I ‘merged’ energetically with the eagle or spirit of eagle and that anyone can do this with practise and intention.  It happened spontaneously for me at that time and has not happened since with eagles, though it has with other life intelligence, such as flowers, or animals, insects etc. and this has happened in various differing ways, but always from a sense of total absorption and love.  I wonder also if there was a memory of shape-shifting in this experience and if you wish to know more about what I mean I invite you to read the next part of the story which happened as we traveled down the Interstate 5 to Oregon… see Animals; Merging and Shape Shifting ~ July 2004 ~ Pacific North West USA

Tune in… can you imagine how it feels to be her?

Inner Marriage on Beltane, 2012

I’ve been away doing tantric sessions/massage with a friend who is also a trainee – something shifted in those few days… she got really ill on Sunday night and it looked like we might not be able to travel. It lifted long enough for us to get home, thank goodness, but it was a trial for both of us in our own ways. I got home and had a long bath chatting with my beloved… after I got out, I started trembling and thought it was lack of food and low blood sugar – which it partly was…. yet it continued even after I eat and drank, so i went upstairs to lie down. I tuned in and also again several times during the evening but all i got was something about ‘solar lions’. I also became aware that something much bigger than my own personal experience had happened during the time I was away and I can only describe it as our soul family had just gone through a major shamanic journey.

A friend in England texted me and said she had picked up something and asked if I was alright.

Later on, in bed, despite being extremely tired and not having slept well since I had left, I just couldn’t sleep and was trembling and shaky (this often indicates to me that something is trying to come through and that I’m not allowing it to) I again asked and finally I got a ‘message’ to get my pad and write, so I turned the light on and noticed it was almost midnight… almost Beltane.

It came through very quickly; it had been waiting for this exact moment when the clock ticked into the next day which, even before Beltane was named, is a day that is energetically open and aligned with the merging of male/female principles.

“An initiation. A marriage within the joining of the two forces of nature destined to be made whole, into oneness – inevitable because they cannot stay apart as they attract each other… because they are already one. Yet, until you stopped looking outside of yourself these two inner forces could not meet because they were committed to anothers forces… their docking stations were already occupied.”

It continued…

“Solar Lion – will you marry yourself?” I answered “YES!” “Do you take yourself in full and whole Love?” Said I, “Yes I do, Yes I do… I Am whole and full of essence of unity of Love.”

“The Unity of Love

A Blessing given freely

To those of Faith

2012 is a year of Faith

Do not sway.”

Do a ceremony – invite in Spirit: angels, elemental energies etc. Wear something nice and gift yourself something as a token of marking this initiation… can be a bought thing or something given by nature. Bring some greenery into the house. Celebrate together.

It was also suggested that as I am already married  that we look at our agreement and update it again because despite having done this previously, we are now different people – and do this prior to the inner marriage ceremony.

The word Beltane is thought to mean bright fire, white and shinning and fire is used to celebrate the waxing of the sun, giver of life.

“I Want to be Veiled!”

As usual, I woke up this morning in fear. Actually, more accurately,  what happens is that I awake, and then a few seconds later, I feel fearful.  It’s not a huge, terrible fear; it’s a quiet, almost indiscernible fear. I’ve  been aware of it for some years now and despite many attempts to root it out I still have it. Nowadays, I notice it more so because I get hot flashes due to menopausal symptoms – what happens with hot flashes for me is that if I have an anxious or fearful reaction to something, I then get a hot flash – it’s like a mild panic attack because the adrenaline is activated.

I used to think this morning fear was just fear at being here, on the planet and not feeling safe, not feeling at home here, so when I come out of sleep, awake and come back into my body, I then realise I am ‘here, and that’s enough to make me go into fear! Or so I thought. Recently though, I began to see that upon awakening, I am actually in my body and it is actually that realisation that causes me to feel fearful, and that’s what makes me to leave the body.

Quite an important distinction here as I had always thought we leave our body when we drop off to sleep. However that is not the whole story, and I think what really happens is that we have to fully come into our body in order to leave it! Not exactly sure how this works, but a theory would be that we have to fully ground into the body so that the part that leaves and merges can do so because it is still connected by the silver thread that has to be fully grounded.

Anyway, today was different because as I awoke in peace and moved into fear, I realised that the fear happens at the moment of realisation that I am separate … an individual person – because in sleep and for a few moments before I become aware, I must be knowing that I am not separate…otherwise, I would not have fear when I realise I am once again an individual.

This was a powerful realisation for me because whilst I have truly once or twice really known the words of Marianne Williamson, that we are in fear of our power, it was not something I had truly connected before. Here was another piece of the jigsaw puzzle falling into place. I feel fear because I am an individual. I dozed off again feeling content with this insight which nicely tied in with an experience I had last year about the power of fully individuating.

Awakening about an hour later, I was aware of hearing myself talk to myself… or perhaps it was a dream without a picture… like a soundtrack. I said “I want to be veiled.” Wow! Did I really hear myself saying that? “I want to be veiled!” I’ve never had a program reveal itself to me in this way before, yet I’m pretty sure it was my sub-conscious talking! Immediately I realised the importance of this on not just an individual but collective scale too. We are frightened of the power of women and so we veil them. Physically this happens in some countries, but it also happens energetically in many others. On another level it happens in each of us, whether male or female, as we each have equal masculine and feminine (yin and yang) whether we are a woman or a man. It also applies to the veil of illusion of this 3D ‘reality’ we live in. That veil is often called ‘Maya’ and it is what keeps us from knowing that we are not separate, but are One with All That Is. People who have psychic powers are able to see through the veil more than others and those who have done a lot of clearing* find that this also thins and
eventually removes this veil.

We in the West can often be heard criticising those countries that force their women to cover up and we cannot easily understand why some women actually say they like to wear the veil because they feel safer. They have this pattern more prominently than we do and as such display it for all of us to see. Each nation carries a piece of the shadow puzzle of human consciousness, and just as each region does, each city, town or village and family also does. Indeed, it continues right down to each individual and beyond.

What would happen if we as a whole could see this reflection as collective issue instead of judging? What happens when we see all human behaviour as a reflection of the collective rather than blaming the person as a being or even as their individual issues? To me this is incredibly exciting thing to explore, because despite being a fairly aware individual and intellectually understand this principle, it is another matter entirely to embody and experience the direct knowing of this truth and then to see the programme that I was running without knowing it was amazing.

Of course, I still had the programme to delete which I did and it’s likely that I won’t have seen the end of it because usually clearing limiting beliefs is not a one-off event but an on-going process. Yet, that experience of hearing myself say “I want to be veiled” was powerful in helping me to see how the collective consciousness works in the individual.

Releasing the fear of being seen is the next step – I’ve done a LOT of work on this already, believe me! There used to be a time that I literally became sick at the thought of speaking in a group – even imagining talking about myself and giving my name was enough to have me shaking with fear… and it was worse when the time came too! These days I am not so bad and most folks would have no idea just how desperately insecure and shy I once was, and still can be from time to time. It has never totally gone away and as I said before,  it’s a work in progress releasing it.

I am reminded that compassion for self and others is imperative when doing the ‘work of the self’ and as we do this work as individual, it affects the whole, the collective, and anything that has been done, can be undone.

If you’d like to know more about the clearing* work I do for myself or are interested in arranging a session please contact me for further information- it is my delight to share this work with others so we can enjoy simply being ourselves. You can find the tool I used on the “Tools”  page (Deleting DNA/Matrix Programmes)

*clearing is how I refer to the practice of rooting out that which is  not helpful for our spiritual growth…

Bliss ~ A Discourse wtih St Germain

Bliss with St Germain through Isaac George

Greetings One and All… this is an audio of a channelling that Isaac George did back in 2000 and it’s with St Germain on the nature of bliss.  It’s one of the most comprehensive explanation of what bliss is that I’ve heard or read… it goes into what bliss is and how we try to hold onto to it, how we push it away, and how we can open up to it more.